All posts in Ask Alix

Dear Sexhibitch, Is it possible to be allergic to semen? I get sore and ‘stingy’ after having sex with my current boyfriend, especially if I let him ejaculate inside me – I’d think it was perhaps an STD, but my mouth also feels odd after I give him oral too!

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Hi there fizzwizard,

Sorry you’ve having an uncomfortable time, sweetmite, and you feel like you need to take Benadryl every time you get drilled!

To answer your question: yes, it is possible to be allergic to semen; the official name for the condition is Human Seminal Plasma Hypersensitivity. The problem hasn’t been examined in a lot of depth, so figures on how common it is vary wildly between studies, although you’re far more likely to have an allergy to nuts than to the contents of your partner’s nutsack.

Hypersensitivity to semen causes symptoms such as a burning sensation; itching; peeling skin; hives; and swelling, which can either be limited just to the areas exposed to the fluid, or can affect the whole body – sometimes to a life-threatening degree if anaphylactic shock sets in. Because many of these symptoms are similar to those of thrush or an STI, the issue is easy to misdiagnose, but if you suspect you may be suffering from an allergy, your doctor can run an aptly-named ‘skin prick’ test to confirm this.

It’s still possible that what you’re experiencing could be the result of a sexually transmitted infection, even though you protest that you’re also experiencing aggravation in your mouth after giving your fella a blow job. STIs such as thrush can affect the oral area too, so I strongly recommend you go for a full sexual health check, and demand that your gent does the same.

There’s also a chance that you’re feeling hurty after getting dirty simply because the sex you’re having is quite vigorous or rough. Giving oral for a long time can leave your mouth ouchy, especially if your man likes to thrust towards your throat with force, or your technique involves wrapping your lips over your teeth. If that’s the problem, using Corsodyl mouthwash and/or Bonjela can help you heal, while getting your chap to be a bit more gentle and switching up your BJ moves will help to reduce skin abrasions in the future. In terms of penetrative sex, lube will help grease the wheels and reduce the wincey feels; I love silicone-based varieties because they last longer than a boring wedding speech.

If it does turn out that you’re allergic to sperm, as well as antihistamines, condoms can help to vastly reduce the effects of an allergy, although people who are sensitive to semen often find that latex makes them flare up too, so opt for a non-latex contraceptive like Durex Real Feel. They’re made from a next-generation non-rubber material called polyisoprene, which also has the advantage of being very thin and very good at transmitting body heat, so they hardly feel like you’re using barrier protection at all.

Sperm allergies can make it tough to conceive, so you’ll need to get your GP to refer you to a specialist should you ever wish to make littluns with someone whose man-juice your body reacts to. Hopefully though, if this is the case, there will be ways doctors can help you end up with a baby bump, rather than just coming up in lumps!

Got a question for Sexhibitch Alix Fox? Email or tweet @AlixFox

 

Alix Fox – Resident Sexhibitch

Alix Fox is an award-winning journalist, presenter and sex educator known for having a personality chirpier than a gargantuan aviary, a composure brighter than a 10,000 watt bulb, and a reputation for imparting reliable advice in a way that’s sensitive and respectful, yet bubbling over the edges with effervescent fun. You’re pretty much guaranteed to come away from one of her talks with a tonne of new ideas and info, and a supersized grin on your chops.

A former editor on Bizarre magazine, where she tried out all sorts of sexual adventures from underwater bondage to investigating unusual smell fetishes, Alix has written for a huge range of publications and websites including Marie Claire, Grazia, Time Out, The Telegraph, Vogue, Closer, Men’s Fitness, The Debrief, Glamour, Cosmopolitan and many others. She pens a column on sex toys for the Metro, and is a finalist for the title of Best Erotic Journalist in the 2015 ETO Awards.

Alix is also an official Sex Expert for Durex, and regularly appears on TV and radio shows, talking about sex and alternative culture. In addition, she teaches educational workshops for Ann Summers.

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Hello there, Sexhibitionists, you glorious human-shapes,

Hope you’re setting today on fire like it’s a pair of polyester curtains hanging dangerously close to a chip pan.

Alix Fox here: journalist, presenter, sex educator, and your resident ‘Sexhibitch’. I’ll be up all hours and up to all sorts throughout the duration of the Sexhibition weekend, from holding Beginners’ BDSM workshops to interviewing guests and performers for Sexhibition TV and judging competitions (with amazing prizes that’ll pop your eyes-es!).

And in the run-up to the event, I’ll be writing regularly here on the website. In fact, I’d like to offer you my services as an ‘Ecstasy Aunt’.*

[ * ‘Agony’ didn’t seem the best word to associate with sex, although I’m well aware there are folks out there who consider pain and pleasure the best combination since gin and tonic, sweet and sour, or, um… accident and emergency?! ]

If you have a question about sex, relationships, fetishes, the ins ‘n’ outs of the old in ‘n’ out, or something kooky regarding nookie, then send your musings to me at and I’ll do my best to furnish you with illuminating answers.

Nothing you might be wondering about could possibly be too mild or too wild, too simple or too silly, too off the wall or too round the twist – and I will keep all identities anonymous, so you can ask away without fear or embarrassment. Send your Qs to me, and I’ll endeavour to provide As, boogaloos!

In the meantime, dearest wonderbuzzards, as I keep my ears (ahem) pricked to hear your queries, in order to keep you productively and seductively occupied, here are a handful of sensual tips all themed around listening – one of the most simple yet important things you can do to improve your intimate life. ‘Ere we go…

Tuning into sex-themed podcasts is a fantastic way to stay clued-up on sexual issues, trends, and politics, plus learn about fresh products and events you might like to investigate further. Podcasts can also spark what can often be highly fruitful dialogue with your significant other.

Sometimes, broaching certain topics with a lover can feel more awkward than trying to squeeze between two tables at a restaurant but drastically underestimating the chunkiness of your thighs/capaciousness of your rear end and accidentally knocking over a random diner’s bowl of carbonara with your butt cheeks as you slowly, squeakily shuffle sideways like a giant inflatable crab, squawking apologies as you turn redder than Carrie’s prom dress and smear strands of creamy spaghetti across the furniture with your arse (just me?!).

If you’d like to talk about something saucy with your partner, but are finding it more difficult to bring up than a demonically possessed baby, try Googling to see if there’s a podcast on the subject. Have it playing while you’re cooking dinner together, say, or doing the washing up one evening, and it could prove to be a ‘natural’ way to spark off a useful chat.

For example, a pal of mine used an episode of Life On The Swingset – a podcast on swinging and open relationships – to successfully kick off a conversation about how sex parties intrigued her, and engineer the couple’s first visit to a swingers’ ball.

I listen to sex podcasts while working out, during my commute, and through headphones as I’m Hoovering (hearing blow job tips while you’re sucking up dustmites makes household chores far less mundane!). My favourites include:

• The Savage Lovecast – probably the most famous broadcast of this type, presented by American gay activist, author and sex educator Dan Savage. Dan begins the show by nattering/ranting about topical news stories, before answering relationship questions from listeners who phone in, sometimes getting input from special guests, too. I don’t always agree with his responses 100%, but that’s partly what makes this podcast more stimulating than a Tabasco enema. Try the free ‘Micro’ episodes first, then if you like ‘em, consider paying for the longer, ad-free ‘Magnum’ versions. I bet you a fiver you’ll be singing along to the theme tune within a month. “Coz there’s nuthin’ you can’t askkkkkkkkkkk, on The Savage Lovecaaaaaasssst!”
• Huffpost Love and Sex – fascinating discussions about everything from what sex is like after 70; to stories from women in ‘sugar baby’ relationships who only date older, wealthy men; to MILF porn.
• The Whorecast – presented by Siouxsie Q, this podcast centres around debates and conversations with sex workers, from strippers to prostitutes to porn stars. A revealing glimpse into the realities of the industry. I particularly recommend the episode where Siouxsie quizzes her mum about how she feels about her daughter being a sex worker.
• The People of Kink – interviews with individuals about their personal S&M journeys, experiences and tastes. One of the most memorable shows I caught lately was with a guy who was into ‘erotic hypnotism’ (hypnojism?!).
• Practically Kinky – great for curious BDSM newcomers and seasoned fans alike, Practically Kinky gives advice on how to use X-rated equipment and toys safely and properly, and also how to navigate the emotional aspects of experimenting with role play, dominance and submission.
• For a more novel listening experience, give Blindfold a whirl. It’s a new app designed to create sensual experiences between heterosexual couples, teach guys new tricks and improve their foreplay techniques, and prevent sex from becoming routine, predictable and more stale than a decade-old digestive. For a small subscription fee, you receive a regular series of recordings of a sexy female voice, instructing a man exactly how to touch his partner. He must listen to and follow the voice’s commands precisely – the app directs his every move. It’s brilliant for gents who worry that they aren’t sufficiently imaginative between the sheets, or couples who like the idea of a threesome but aren’t yet ready to deal with the potential pitfalls of inviting a Real Live Other Human into their boudoir: play the Blindfold recordings out loud, and it’s almost like having a third person in the room. Press play, the get to playing…
• Let TED enter your bed – here’s a list of sex-related TED talks: https://www.ted.com/topics/sex Handy! Randy!
• Into erotic fiction? Consider purchasing a collection of stories as an audiobook rather than reading them. Listen to a tale as you shower or bathe in the evening to turn you on before bedtime, or listen in public if you think you have the self-control to hide the fact your gusset is becoming so wet you could spawn Sea Monkeys in it.
• Feeling particularly filthy? Head to – a collection of audio clips featuring the sounds of strangers masturbating, orgasming, being spanked, etc. It’s voyeuristic, dirty as a farmer’s boot, and a lot of people find it turns them on like a light switch.

Hopefully that’s given you a little bit of aural inspiration, sizzlerashers. I await your questions with (mastur)bated breath…

Alix Xx